For The Heart Cries

A sentence written by Kathryn Schulz in the New Yorker that captured my life. "No matter how beautifully your life is arranged, no matter how lovingly you tend to it, it will not stay that way forever." There was a time when my life was beautifully lived under a rainbow, surrounded by bright blue skies - embraced with tender and caring love, full of gleeful joy and happiness. A future that was bright and full of promises and dreams, shared and tended to with desire and affection. Then, sudden suicide, a devastating death and all was gone, all was lost. Life forever changed, never the same again. Contact: fortheheartcries@gmail.com

All the time, all the time...when suicide suddenly enters our life with the loss of a loved one, our mind is trapped in a moment of time - that we constantly think about all the time. We are overwhelmed with sadness and sorrow - we cry and cry, tears that never dry. We have trouble focusing, thinking clearly and have sleepless nights because we are lost in thought of that moment in time - all the time. We try to clear our minds of that heartbreaking moment but are never successful - we are scarred and wounded, doing our best to cope with the grief, loss and anger within us. We try to live with what has happened, to return to a sense of normalcy - but our mind keeps taking us back to that moment in time - all the time, to the one we love and miss, all the time. And without even realizing it, we can dwell on that moment for hours, even days. We struggle with how people can go on with their lives so easily, as we are entangled in the past moment that is forever in the pres