If only, if only...two simple words. But if you have lost a loved one to suicide, those two words, "if only" - are a turbulent tornado that torture us and torment us relentlessly and endlessly.
If only he talked to me, if only she called me, if only I stayed home, if only I called to say hello, if only I invited her out to lunch, if only I stopped by his apartment.
If only, if only...two words that leave us trapped to a past we cannot change and cannot escape. Every death needs someone to blame and those two words, if only, eventually lead us to find fault within ourselves and to blame ourselves. But it is not our fault, we are not to blame. There is no fault, no blame.
Suicide is death by sadness - caused by the dark demons of depression and despair. And after these demons create endless battles within the mind, a person becomes detached from life - and suicide become a sanctuary from the pain and suffering.
If only life wasn't so cruel, if only lif…