MUSIC, MEMORIES & SUICIDE

Music creates memories. Music is memories. The music we listened to in our late teens and 20's becomes the soundtrack of our lives. Then there are our special songs, those personal songs we share with a loved one or a dear friend. When we're together and that song comes on the radio, we share a smile and sing along, a loud and joyful carpool karaoke.

Anne and I had used to sing along to Judy Collins singing Suzanne, "For she's touched your perfect body with her mind." And to Albatross, "Come away alone, come away alone, with me." And the Beatles, Hey Jude, "You have found her...remember to let her into your heart." But our favorite was Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da, loud and cheerful we sang, "Obladi, oblada, life goes on brahh, lala how the life goes on." Until it doesn't, until it doesn't.

So what happens to those special songs when our loved one or dear friend commits suicide? Does it fade away, disappears? When it comes on the radio, do you turn the station and try to forget or do you listen with warm memories and tears in your eyes - remembering, remembering? Although a song and its memories can make us sad, break our hearts again, they are precious and should be cherished.

I am sadly reminded of a song by Ringo, "All I got is a photograph and I realize you're coming back anymore."

I also have special songs. Two songs released by the Moody Blues years after Anne's death, remind me of her more than the songs we shared. And when I hear these songs, they are a prayer from me to her. "I know you're out there somewhere, somewhere, somewhere. I know I'll find you somehow, somehow and somehow I'll return to you again." And, "I wonder where you are, I wonder if you think about me, once upon a time in your wildest dreams, in your wildest dreams."

So, in your wildest dreams, somewhere, somehow, turn that very special song that brings tears to your eyes, into a prayer of remembrance - a prayer of remembrance.

Contact: fortheheartcries@gmail.com