Sleepwalking Through A Nightmare

When you have lost a loved one to suicide, you spend weeks, months, even years - sleepwalking through a nightmare. Wherever you are, whatever you are doing, your mind is elsewhere - back to the day you received the tragic news and its mournful grief.

At other times, your mind wanders to days in the future when birthdays and holidays are not days of celebration but days to be endured - as we continue sleepwalking through a nightmare.

We encounter friends, acquaintances, as we go about our daily routines - we hear their voices but not their words. Often we do errands, going to the supermarket, pharmacy, library and post office - then have no recollection of doing so. Why? Because we are lost in thought, troubling thoughts of a past we cannot change but cannot escape, accept.

Our hearts, bodies and souls are broken, we ache with pain. We are held prisoner by our minds and thoughts as we suffer mostly in silence. In time our grief will lessen but it will never fade away, as we try to bear our sorrow with dignity, as we continue walking through a nightmare - from which we can only escape, find refuge, when we are sound asleep.



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